What Makes it Different When the Abuser is a Police Officer 

When your abuser Is also a police officer, you have nowhere to hide. . . .

You are isolated from family, friends, and other police officers' spouses.
Fear of the abuser may prevent your friends or family from helping you.
You may be afraid to go to shelter because your abuser knows or can easily find out the location of area shelters.
Your abuser may know shelter personnel and gain entrance or information either by lying or through intimidation.
You may be afraid to risk the safety of other shelter residents, family or friends.
You may fear that domestic violence advocates share information with the police.
You may be afraid to access medical care because providers may contact law enforcement.
The usual sources of community help and support are unavailable, untrained, or unwilling to risk helping you.
Your abuser intimidates and/or threatens your family and friends if they assist you in any way.
Your abuser has access to vehicle registration information, social security information, etc.

Your abuser has had professional training to. . . .

Take control in any and all situations.
Intimidate by presence alone - the uniform, the stance, the voice. 
Interrogate people to get information.
Be deceptive and manipulative.
Blame others for own use of force.
Use weapons.
Use body as a weapon.
Inflict pain and leave no marks or bruises.

Misuse of job perquisites as an officer enables. . . .

"Patrolling" of your house, work place, children's day care center by abuser or fellow officers.
Use of surveillance tools such as phone taps; sound-activated audio and video recording of your activities in the house. 
Use of police scanner to listen to cellular phone calls.
Attachment of vehicle tracking devices to your car.
Ability to run license plates, obtain documentation, find unlisted phone numbers and addresses of anyone whom you contact. 
Your abuser to enter your house or vehicle at will using lock pick tools and skills.
Enlistment of neighbors to watch and report your activities in return for "favors." 
Harassment of you, your family or friends with traffic stops, evidence planting, false arrests.

You face overwhelming psychological threats and emotional barriers. . .

No one believes you.
You are labeled as crazy or as a troublemaker.
Family, friends, or neighbors may not honor your confidentiality.
Your disclosure of abuse challenges others' disbelief that a police officer can be a batterer.
The abuser says that as a police officer, it is their version of the story that will be believed.
You know your abuser will punish you for interfering with job.
The police abuser uses interrogation and "the voice" to intimidate and humiliate you and loved ones.
The level of potential lethality is greater when the abuser is a police officer.
Your abuser has the means to harm or kill you if you interfere with their career.
The abuser claims to know how to commit the "perfect crime."
The abuser claims to know criminals who would harm you, if told to do so.
The abuser threatens to kill you both in the event of a job loss.
The abuser threatens to kill you and make it look like a suicide.
The abuser suggests that you use their firearm to kill yourself.

Problems in calling the police...

The abuser IS the police.
Police may be slow in responding to calls from your home.
The abuser claims that it was self-defense, that the abuser was attempting to restrain you from inflicting physical abuse, or that your wounds are self-inflicted.
You have betrayed the police family.
The department may show greater concern for the department's liability or public image than for your safety.
When responding officers  (colleagues/friends) respond to your call they may:

• Use their discretion because department policy is not enforced or nonexistent.
• Attempt to talk you out of pressing charges.
• Sympathize with the abuser; automatically responding to "officer in distress."
• Accuse you of lying or threaten you with charges of mutual abuse and mutual arrest.

Misuse of the legal system...

Knowledge of laws and procedures enables abuser to tell you "their" version of the law. 
Abuser purposely misrepresents pieces of criminal or civil law that are advantageous to him and detrimental to you.
You do not have access to remedies available to civilian victims; State's Attorney may discourage you from signing a complaint or may refuse to press charges against a police officer.
Judges often reprimand both parties, insinuating that you are both at fault.
Courts and legal system are your abuser's daily work environment while you are intimidated by the courtroom, judge and lawyers.
Police officers often personally know the judges, bailiffs, prosecutors, attorneys.
Officers are professionally trained to present themselves well in court. The abuser knows what to say and how to shade the truth or to turn the evidence.
A police abuser has fellow officers (in uniform) accompany him or her to court to intimidate you and others present.
Officers are allowed in the courtroom wearing their weapons.