Domestic violence crosses all age, ethnic, socioeconomic, religious, and
educational boundaries. There are doctors, ministers, psychologists,
police, attorneys, judges, and other professionals who beat their wives.
Battering also occurs in lesbian and gay male relationships.
Domestic violence is virtually impossible to measure with absolute
precision due to numerous complications including the societal stigma that
inhibits victims from disclosing their abuse and the varying definitions
of abuse used from study to study. Estimates range from 960,000 incidents
of violence against a current or former spouse, boyfriend, or girlfriend
per year to 3.9 million women who are physically abused per year. Thirty
percent of Americans say they know a woman who has been physically abused
by her husband or boyfriend in the past year.
Dynamics of Domestic Violence
How
do you know if you might be in an abusive relationship?
Abusive relationships can be
defined as a relationship in which one partner shows a pattern of
assaultive and coercive behaviors toward the other partner. This includes
couples who are married or unmarried, gay or straight. Types of abuse can
include physical, emotional, social, economic, and sexual.
Does your
intimate partner...
Insult or drive
away your friends or family
Continually
criticize you, call you names, shout at you
Ignore your
feelings
Use lies and
contradictions to manipulate you
Humiliate you in
private or public; refuse to socialize with you
Mock or insult
your personal beliefs, religion, race, or heritage
Regularly
threaten to leave, or tell you to leave
Threaten to get
custody of the children
Threaten to
kidnap the children
Abandon you in
dangerous places
Drive recklessly
or force you to drive recklessly
Hide or take
away your car keys
Lock you out of
your house or apartment
Prevent you from
taking medication, eating, using the bathroom
Refuse to help
you when you are sick, injured, or pregnant
Threaten to or
abuse your loved ones
Threaten to or
abuse your pets
Demand that you
account for your daily activities, expenses, travel
Use a hidden
tape recorder or camera to spy on you
Stalk you either
physically or through e-mail or repeated phone calls
Check your mail,
answering machine, caller ID, email
Insist you dress
in a more sexual way than you want
Minimize the
importance of your feelings about sex
Become jealously
angry, accuse you of sexual activity with others
Insist that you
perform sexual acts which make you uncomfortable
Force you to
have sex
Forbid you to
use protection against sexually transmitted diseases
Forbid you to
use birth control
Force
you to have sex with others, or force you to watch others having sex
Videotape you
during sex
Pressure you to
view or read pornography
Force you to
incur debt or ruin your credit
Control your
money
Hide income,
bank accounts or investments
Gamble, borrow
money that forces you into debt
Refuse to pay
family bills
Force you to
sign fraudulent claims, checks, tax returns
Threaten
to call your employer and lie about your mental health or personal history
Forbid you to
work, go to school, accept a promotion
Force you to
regularly be late to work, absent, or leave work early
Corner you, push
you, throw you down
Throw things at
you
Pull your hair
Slap or grab you
Scratch or bite
you
Kick or punch
you
Choke you
Threaten to use
or use a weapon against you
Inflict any type
of physical abuse during pregnancy
Deny or prevent
your access to necessary medical attention.
Speak and Act for Change and
Justice through RESPECT...EMPOWERMENT....EDUCATION....VALIDATION
